"Your body is a temple," said Billy Baxter, another member of the focus group who's been up the last 48 hours on a cocaine binge. The last thing I'm going to do is fill that temple with high-fructose corn syrup. He then did a monster rail and passed out.
While Coca Cola has taken steps to increase its addictiveness, including using food additives such as MSG in a form yet to be banned by the FDA, nothing seems to be improving sales with the demographic. "I don't get it," said marketing exec Milford Bradley. "We've taken all the calories out, lowered the price, even revamped the packaging. What more do these people want?" Replied coke-head Stevie Peppers, "Coke."
