After a valiant two-thousand-year attempt at forming cultural bonds through language, marketing execs have masterfully infiltrated, murdered and skull-fucked all forms of verbal connection, churning its bloody, decimated corpse into corporate profit.

"I'm loving it," said local trend-starter Darvin Cross. "Uh, that's a McDonalds slogan now," Darvin's friend told a now-dejected Darvin. 

Said sociologist Dr. Price, "there is a concerted effort effort on the part of the youth to separate themselves from their predecessors through slang. Unfortunately, within minutes of any new word being posted, Carl's Junior has already inserted it into their next large-breasted-blonde-sloppily-biting-into-a-burger commercial."

However, not everyone is in agreement. "There is no revolution." a video-game exec told a packed conference room. "Except Dance-Dance Revolution. "No," said Dove soap corporate exec. "There is a curvy-girl revolution. And they prefer Dove soap because it works with their fat skin." "That's just ignorant." said an Apple exec. "The revolution is a digital one, and those 'in-the-know' tap into it with an iPhone." "Have it your [motherfucking] way," said Burger King spokesman before storming out. 

As of press-time, there is no consensus that there actually is any revolution except the marketing revolution and a confused Darvin opened his mail to find three separate checks from McDonalds for twenty-five cents with an offer for five-thousand dollars to tattoo 'I'm loving it' on his forehead. 


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