Hipster Tate Dunbag had a terrible date last night, making this the 15th one in a row and prompting him to ask the eternal question, "It's not me right? It's totally them."

Sources close to Tate interviewed  his latest "victim" to find out what went wrong. "I liked his beard," Samantha Adams said. "So I brought up camping to which he replied, "Never been, never want to." "Ohhhkay," continued Tammy. "To break up the awkward moment, I asked him what book he read last since he was wearing thick, black-framed glasses." "Oh," replied Tate. "Books are so last century."

"It was confusing," said Samantha. "In the 45 minutes I was with him, he didn't divulge one personal thing about himself. "Well, yeah I did," responded Tate. "It's easy if you use process of elimination. All you have to do is subtract everything I mocked." Added Samantha, "The guy's like a padded bra, he looks like he had so much more underneath."

Psychologist Adam Levy weighed in on the situation. "Teen angst is a common term for a period whereby the child responds favorably to reverse psychology. Meaning, he doesn't do things he likes, he does things that go against what you like. This usually wains by high school. In 25 year-old Tate's situation, he's in a state known as arrested development- a funny TV show, but a sad, meaningless way of living."

Overall, Tate surfaced from the date confident it was not his fault. "She didn't get me, plain and simple. In fact, the only thing she did get was that since I ride an eco-friendly mode of transportation [a bicycle], that I live at home with my parents and I'm broke."


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