Showing posts with label Movie Reviews. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Movie Reviews. Show all posts
Closed Circuit
Cloud Atlas
After watching Inception, I felt like the people talking about how deep and meaninful it was were victims of The Emperor's New Clothes. The reason I didn't buy into Inception is b/c, for me, their dream within a dream was just a movie within a movie. Inception didn't feel like something that exists in reality, unless you stretch and extrapolate the ideas to the point of pontificating. Cloud Atlas, on the other hand, transcends being just a movie- it's an allegory about life in a language I couldn't quite grasp, but I'm not insecure about not getting stuff, so I had fun trying. If you have hangups about looking dumb for not understanding something you won't last a half hour. You have to put aside your ego to watch this, don't overthink it too much, and like an epiphany, at one point whatever meaning is waiting for you to discover will precipitate.
Anchorman 2
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Now, Anchorman 2. It didn't need a message, but it has one, and it's good! And it's funny! I didn't even really care for the first one. I didn't dislike it, but I always felt like it was overhyped. This one is underhyped. Probably b/c mainstream media wouldn't like to push a movie that shows the evolution of the bullshit news that pervades the airwaves today. Best movie, not even comedy, I've seen in well over a year! Sure there are flaws. The fight sequence pissed me off b/c a bunch of stars shoe horned themself in. Will Smith had no place in this movie, Jim Carrey added nothing, but they all had to have their little moments which just pulled the movie down. But it is a testament to the power of this movie that so many stars were clawing to get cameos.
Drive
I don't know why this movie was so appealing to me, but it was. It's a blend of action and drama, two seemingly opposing genres, yet the director pulls it off magnificently. The movie has the same feel as "Collateral," an 80's urban, noire style, but you just don't know where it's going. The characters are familiar, the psychopath who craves stability (sidenote,what is it about psychopaths that crave stability? From watching Dexter to this, I find the subject fascinating), the fragile single-mother rene-zellwegger type, the adorable kid, the just-got-out-of prison husband, yet the story is nothing of the sort. Ryan Gosling gives a superb performance switching between a psychotic Christian Bale and charismatic Noah Wyle.
This, to me, represents an Indie. Usually, I hate Indies. Why when I hear a guitar strumming in the background of the opening credits am I compelled to turn it off? Indies, to me, represent a credo that I simply don't agree with, namely, that it's okay to accept one's pitiful station in life. All Indies seem to share this common loser thread. It starts with the character in a shitty situation, things happen, main guy/girl fails, main guy/girl learns that it's okay and embraces their still-shitty lives. Fuck that! But this Indie was different. Though he fails, i.e. doesn't get the girl, goes back to shitty life, he accomplishes something noble in the process. He doesn't merely accept his shitty plight, he has no choice, and we understand that if he could get the girl, he would. So for that this is the best Indie I've seen to date. Actually, it's the first Indie I've ever liked. A-
THE HANGOVER- PART 2
If I had to sum up The Hangover 2, I'd say it was like the movie The Hangover, except in Thailand. Substitute a missing tooth for a tattoo, a baby for a monkey and a vegas stripper for a bangkok hooker and <BAM> you got a sequel. Now, I'm willing to grant some latitude considering it's predecessor was the best comedy in the last 2 years. So fine, recycle your premise, but for fuck sake, don't steal your jokes!
Okay, there's a wedding they need to get to, okay, you got drugged again, okay you lost one of your guys, okay now you need to search for him, okay, wait a minute, the little asian guy's jumping out of a confined space again and beating them up. Time out! Oh, now Stu's gonna sing an impromptu song? I can't laugh b/c I'm busy thinking, "How the fuck did Stu find an acoustic guitar on the boat" and "didn't I already see this w/ a piano?" This movie revamped so much of the original, it should've been called, "The Hangover- Greatest Hits, remastered."
Okay, there's a wedding they need to get to, okay, you got drugged again, okay you lost one of your guys, okay now you need to search for him, okay, wait a minute, the little asian guy's jumping out of a confined space again and beating them up. Time out! Oh, now Stu's gonna sing an impromptu song? I can't laugh b/c I'm busy thinking, "How the fuck did Stu find an acoustic guitar on the boat" and "didn't I already see this w/ a piano?" This movie revamped so much of the original, it should've been called, "The Hangover- Greatest Hits, remastered."
Nevertheless, if you liked the original, you'll like the sequel, just not as much. Overall grade: B
The Dilemma
Ron Howard should have his comedy directing privileges revoked. On one side, he wanted to let the actors explore the depths of conflict by extending scenes until they were completely tapped out. But then again, he wanted a nice, neat ending that you could see coming a mile away. You can't have both. Do I sound bitter at the man for not giving me any speaking lines in Frost Nixon? Okay, I'm pissed. But seriously, asking him to direct a comedy is like asking Ron Jeremy to direct the next M. Knight Shyamalan movie.
Hopefully, the storyline of when to tell a friend about cheating and the difference when it's a guy versus a girl will be explored much better in a future movie not involving any of this cast or crew. But for now, if you're looking for laughs, please God, look elsewhere. Overall Grade: D+
About the critic
I’m an early 30’s male actor/writer, been in He’s Just Not That Into You and Frost Nixon. My taste is pretty much mainstream. I like movies to be entertaining and uplifting. Here’s a list of my top 150 so you know where I’m coming from.
Top 150 Movies in no particular order (j/k)
- Fight Club
- Dead Poet’s Society
- The Matrix
- Forest Gump
- Big Lebowski
- Office Space
- Gattica
- Good Will Hunting
- The Fugitive
- Gladiator
- Falling Down
- Blind date
- Total Recall
- The Firm
- Something about Mary
- 40 year old Virgin
- Wedding Crashers
- After Hours
- Kindergarten Cop
- 8 Mile
- The Gods must be crazy
- The Incredibles
- Shallow Hal
- True Lies
- The Game
- Running man
- Minority Report
- Die hard, Live free or die hard
- Dumb and Dumber
- Meet the parents/fockers
- Coming to America
- 6th day
- What about Bob?
- Day after tomorrow
- Rush Hour 2
- The DaVinci Code
- Hangover
- Southpark
- Simpsons
- Taken
- Dark knight
- Terminator 2, 3
- End of Days
- Trading places
- The Girl Next Door
- The Tao of Steve
- Bourne Identity series
- Zoolander
- Van Wilder
- Talladega Nights
- Weird Science
- Indiana Jones
- The Patriot
- Braveheart
- National Treasure
- Step Brothers
- Old School
- The Count of Monte Crisco
- Knocked up
- The Score
- Beverly hills cop
- Patch Adams
- The Rainmaker
- Point Break
- Lethal weapon
- Borat
- Bruce Almighty
- Dodgeball
- Elf
- Chicago
- Just Married
- Legally Blonde
- Crank
- Casino Royal
- School of Rock
- Mrs. Doubtfire
- Iron Man
- Spider man 2
- Ace Ventura
- Goonies
- Men at Work
- 48 hours
- Friday
- Just Friends
- Anchorman
- Raising Arizona
- American Dreamz
- Tommy Boy
- Black Sheep
- Major League
- 300
- Shawshank Redemption
- Idiocracy
- Wall Street
- Wayne’s World (1,2)
- Waiting
- Walk Hard
- Head of State
- Bringing down the house
- Dude where’s my car?
- Invention of Lying
- Click
- Fred Claus
- Ghost Town
- Jackass
- Back to the future (series)
- Big
- Bachelor Party
- Top Gun
- Slumdog Millionaire
- Thank you for smoking
- Basic Instinct
- Harold and Kumar
- The Proposal
- Beverly hills cop
- Miss Congeniality
- Star Trek
- The Natural
- Rudy
- Bad Santa
- Barber shop
- Weekend at Bernies
- Mission Impossible
- Batman Begins
- Superman 2
- The golden child
- The money pit
- American Pie
- Road Trip
- Swingers
- Clueless
- Demolition man
- White men can’t jump
- Lover Boy
- Naked Gun
- Groundhog day
- Ferris Bueller’s day off
- Twins
- Don’t mess w/ Zohan
- The Town
- Rain man
- Cocktail
- Knight and Day
- Jerry Mcguire
- Ron Burgundy
- The Other Guys
- Spanglish
- Beverly Hills Ninja
- Catch me if you can
- Day and Knight
Hollywood Homicide (2003)
I simply cannot remember walking out of another movie. We only went because we got to meet Harrison Ford at the premiere in Westwood and got his autograph. Believe me, I wanted to like this movie. Since then, I used the autograph as toilet paper and it still wasn’t as shitty as this movie. F
He’s Just Not That Into You (2009)
“Okay, I’m a little bias.” First off, if you’re going to see this movie without a girl, see it alone. Here’s why. It’s a chick flick. You’ll feel awkward seeing it with a dude, unless you swing that way. Now, here's the thing, it's actually not bad. You laugh a few times, see part of Scarlett Johansson's boobs, and poof, it's over. So, if you're like me and you trade off one chick flick for one action movie with your girl, this one’s a good pick. B |
Inception (2010)
This movie reminds me of the tale of the emperor’s new clothes. If everybody tells you that it’s smart and deep then for you to speak up and say it’s not makes you appear dumb. Well, after studying at Oxford University and getting a masters degree in clinical neuroscience (yeah, great springboard for an entertainment career), I keeps it simple and don’t worry about intellectual posturing. If you go into the movie wanting to get lost in the dream levels, you will, and you’ll enjoy it. If you try to solve the Rubik’s cube, you’ll discover there’s no algorithm that unravels a ball of bullshit. Just realize what you’re dealing with and you won’t get your hands dirty. B+
Knocked Up (2007)
First, knocked up is the best comedy of '07, hands down.
Now, the biggest problem I had w/ this movie is not the sincerity of the characters, who were in fact more real than 40 Y.O.V, but the lack of realism in the plot.
First, the bar scene where they meet. Allison, hot successful chick, is not even drunk when she decides to stay w/ dowdy Ben over her sister who is leaving. Reality check, girls always leave together, especially sisters.
Second, the pregnancy. Allison is worried she'll lose her job and be forever linked to a guy she barely knows or likes and she decides to keep the baby. Reality check, American girls in this situation abort. And if not, there'd better be a strong religious aspect or I'm not buying it.
Third, Ben sticks around. Sure she's hot, but they have nothing, and I mean, nothing in common personality-wise. They fight, he decides to finally read the pregnancy books and comes back. Reality check, Ben would not completely change in real life, he’d run. The only way he stays is if she gets forced to have the kid b/c her parents find out and are deeply religious, her job says she can keep and even get promoted in her job if she has segments on E! (where she works) including Ben, and Ben signs something w/ E! that, if broken, would not only get him fired, but deported (he's canadian living in U.S. illegally).
All the tools were there to make this plot an air-tight reality. Unfortunately, I was busy masturbating to Mr. Skin's website during the directing of this film. A-
Now, the biggest problem I had w/ this movie is not the sincerity of the characters, who were in fact more real than 40 Y.O.V, but the lack of realism in the plot.
First, the bar scene where they meet. Allison, hot successful chick, is not even drunk when she decides to stay w/ dowdy Ben over her sister who is leaving. Reality check, girls always leave together, especially sisters.
Second, the pregnancy. Allison is worried she'll lose her job and be forever linked to a guy she barely knows or likes and she decides to keep the baby. Reality check, American girls in this situation abort. And if not, there'd better be a strong religious aspect or I'm not buying it.
Third, Ben sticks around. Sure she's hot, but they have nothing, and I mean, nothing in common personality-wise. They fight, he decides to finally read the pregnancy books and comes back. Reality check, Ben would not completely change in real life, he’d run. The only way he stays is if she gets forced to have the kid b/c her parents find out and are deeply religious, her job says she can keep and even get promoted in her job if she has segments on E! (where she works) including Ben, and Ben signs something w/ E! that, if broken, would not only get him fired, but deported (he's canadian living in U.S. illegally).
All the tools were there to make this plot an air-tight reality. Unfortunately, I was busy masturbating to Mr. Skin's website during the directing of this film. A-
Last Holiday (2006)
See now, that's why you go to movies. A tale of hope revamping the "carpe diem" theme originally set in Dead Poet's Society. “Life is short, if you don't stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it” (Ferris Bueller). Queen Latifa takes Ferris’ advice in this comedy, but out of necessity, not triumph. She's been given three weeks to live. The theme: live each day like it's your last.
Queen Latifa has this down-to-earth persona that really carries the movie from its beginning with her working as a sales associate in a dept. store. Seeing her naturally assume the role of the underdog made me want to cast out every stupid J. Lo movie ever made with her as the suppressed Cinderella who would before long find her prince and shine. The difference? J. Lo's a diva and a brat and her humble-beginnings roles come off as self serving and self indulgent. She'd like to come off like Queen Latifa, but to carry these types of roles it has to come from the heart.
Some people really do appreciate life and everything it has to offer, others just want more. Or as the Antagonist in Last Holiday says "more is never enough." B+
Guess Who (can't direct a comedy?) (2005)
I liked it better when the white dude was Ben Stiller and was called meet the parents. If Ashton Kutcher wasn't on personality arrest, it could have gone a different direction. The worst part about this movie is this wasn't even an original screenplay, it's from "guess who" in the 1960's. Get some originality Hollywood and stop robbing the grave. And the whole racial thing going on, nonexistent in my eyes. It was such a promising storyline, I was sure this movie was going to rock. But alas.
The fault lies entirely with the director who wanted desperately to catch that awkwardness that Ben Stiller is renowned for doing. When "Simon" arrives to meet his black girlfriend's parents and the father mistakes the black cab driver for the boyfriend, Simon delivers a hysterical line. "I wish Therese would have told me her parents were black. That would have saved an awkward moment." But instead of letting him say the line, we see the daughter and mom's reaction, then the long pause, then the father's reaction, Simon says the first part. Then it cuts to a close up. Then he says "that would have saved an awkward moment. And immediately it cuts to the father, then Simon who wiggles his eyes side to side in an awkward moment attempt. Then the daughter says something but we don't ever see their reaction. A lot is lost w/o going back and seeing it unfold in front of your eyes, but if you do go back, you can see how the humor was lost, which it was continuosly lost throughout the movie. D
Million Dollar Baby (2004)
Million dollar baby is inappropriately named. Perhaps in the first draft of the screenplay the movie was to steer you into abortion issues, that's the only way I can figure they got "baby" out of the title. Instead, they use boxing as the bait and then switch it to reveal this is to pull at your heart strings over the issue of euthanasia. If I had to sum up this movie in only one word it would be this: EVIL. Two words, evil and depressing. What's the point of a movie? I thought it was to entertain. I was emotionally drained from this film. Maybe those jaded folks out there who are so desensitized that they feel practically nothing got their emotions temporarily resuscitated, but for most normal, feeling people with souls this is just someone saying "life sucks dude. The higher you reach, the harder you'll fall." Screw that kind of mentality, and screw this film. And especially, screw Continetal airlines for showing it and freaking out my innocent girlfriend. C-
Waiting (2001)
“Makes you want to get hammered and do dumb shit”
Now this is why I come to the movies- to laugh my arse off, and that is exactly what "Waiting" does. It's great b/c there's really only two ways to go, you're either cool, so you of course loved it, or you are not cool, in which case you were offended or grossed out, or whatever, who cares, you suck. The trailer says it all, I mean if you like the trailer, you can't not like the movie. But if you went to see if the b!tchy girl who eats a dandruff infested steak gets revenge, well you're in for a disappointment. Monty (Ryan Renolds), the main character, is one of the best upcoming comedic actors around. His style seems to me to be very close to Chevy Chase, upbeat, apathetic yet clever at the same time. It’s not the 40 year old virgin or wedding crashers, but it is a must see if you like-a to party. A- |
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